Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
