I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize