Whod you bang
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
