Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
