You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
