Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
