dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
