I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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