I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
All the doctor said was why
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
