Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize