If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I touched a dick in church today
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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