you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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