so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
