no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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