After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
