yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
