I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
