I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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