Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Randomize
