It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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