Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
