$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize