She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
