i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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