have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize