there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
