Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
