I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
