Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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