the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
