I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
you had me at cake vodka
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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