I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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