I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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