Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize