also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize