i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
