I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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