Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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