i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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