it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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