ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So gin and wine won't be happening again
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
