Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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