yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
