would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
These tits shall not be calmed
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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