Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I skipped work to stalk him.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
