So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
