Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
