angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
