she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize