i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I think a kid would responsible me up
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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