I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
It's shark week go big or go home
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize